Monday, April 20, 2009

What Should I Do??

Stuy and I have been talking on a regular basis now and I have to admit I like it. I am remembering why I did like him so much; we always had good convo and he always seemed like he genuinely cared about me and what I had to say and what was going on in my life.



So last night we stayed up talking til 430am (mind you I had to wake up at 645am for my 8oclock class) but that didnt stop me. I told him how I really felt then and now...Im only going to elaborate on the important parts of the conversation:

Stuy: wen u ready to change 4 me, leme kno
Stuy: until then idk wat to tell u Shay
Me: y do i need to change 4 u. thats y we didnt work...u wasnt satisfid wit me. u wanted me to change. 2 b the person u wanted, 2 do all u asked n wanted
Stuy: OMGGGGGG
Stuy: thats not the case. i dont want u 2 change but damn, atleast muthafuckn compromise. u so stuck in ya fuckn ways u dont realize ur impossible to deal wit and THATS y we didnt work
Me: not every situation can b compromised. u just want so much its ridiculous
Stuy: if i want too much wats the point in even talkin to me??
Me: u really want me 2 answer that
Stuy: yes i do
Me: becuz i still have feelings 4 u. u did shit 2 me that hurt n there were plenty of times i wanted 2 call it quits but i couldnt. n the way we ended was the only way 2 try n let u go. but wen u hit me up my feelings came bak. i rememba all ur ways yet the attraction n shit is still there
Stuy: damn, i aint know that

Then he wanted to know wat did he do to hurt me and I gave him like 3 examples and situations we was in that affected my feelings towards him.

Stuy: im not saying i was the perfect partner while we was together, but i neva knew the shit i did bothered u like that. u really kept ya feelings to yaself alot. im sorry 4 da shit i did, i neva meant to hurt u. i cared about u tho. although i did some shit @ times, i treated u good. and thought that would b enuff to keep u happy

We ended up talking on the phone after that for the next 2 hrs about us. He then asked if I am willing to drop the other guys in my life to fuck with him again??? Ummm idk is what I said.

We started talking and shit and it felt like normal times again...the good times when shit was sweet between us and it felt real good because I still do have feelings for him but idk if I'm willing to drop the others to give us a go again because I dont know if he's worth it. I mean would I be like those dumb girls who deserve to be treated badly because they go back to the men who hurt them?? Is it really a wise decision to invest my time in him again?? Im actually leaning towards a yes because it just feels so right but in the end I dont know. I need advice...even though in the end it is my decision. THIS IS JUST SO HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!

5 comments:

  1. well I think.....you should.....follow...your....um...gut! lol. not ur heart cuz the heart is misleading sometimes. and not ur mind cuz the mind is dumb sometimes...so follow your gut! do what the gut tells you to do.

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  2. In MY opinion, I think that since he hurt you, you should make him work for you. If the strong feeling is mutual, then he will learn his lesson and REALLY WANT to make it work. He has to be reminded of how lucky he is to have you. Whatever decision you make girl, keep it cool ;)

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  3. You Should Definitely Think Hard About That One.....It's Always Great To Reconnect And Talk To Your Ex's Especially When You Had A Strong Connection Before....But Don't Forget Why They Became Your Ex In The First Place. I Realized That My Ex Will Most Likely Still Carry The Flaws Which Forced Us To Separate In The First Place, And I'd Really Have To Settle For Taking The Good And The Bad If We Ever Got Together Again.

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  4. Theres a reason hes ur ex, don't go back.

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  5. Truth be told, when your with a guy, they shouldn't force you into a relationship, because thats when shit gets hectic and crazy.

    When im talking to a guy i let them know im talking to other dudes, and if i feel secure with only talking to that one guy, eventually i tend to stop talking to all of the other guys gradually, until im only talking to that ONE guy.

    It usually works better like that

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