So I'm talking to Stuy last night and we get into the topic of people making their relationship "official". According to him, what's the point of making a relationship official if both parties are happy with the way things are going. Stuy claims that when you put a title, it makes everything more confusing and things take a turn for the worse.
Now I do understand where he is coming from because sometimes people do tend to start acting differently when a title is put on a relationship, but I still think it is needed. I mean if one really thinks about it, if there is no title on a relationship people tend to take advantage. For example, if one party does go out on dates with other people or engages in sexual activities with someone else, would it really be considered cheating? Some might say no because technically this person isn't in a relationship, they just "talk, date, or spend time" with someone. Others (including Stuy) would say yes this is cheating because if you are commited to this person, then title or not, you should not be spending time with someone else let alone having sex with them.
Then he goes on to saying that he has a problem with committment and he's happy with the way things are. He then ask me what would I do or say if he says he just wants us to stay the way we are and he won't be putting a title on us or anything. I said I would say goodbye because to me that means our relationship isn't going anywhere. I understand one shouldn't be tlaking to someone just for that title, but to me it means that the relationship is going somewhere and you have more things to look forward to as the relationship progresses.
We then get on the topic of marriage and he says that he doesn't know if he sees himself ever getting married. He rathers being in a committed relationship knowing that the girl is there for him no matter what then just getting married and having to worry about her infidelities. I just don't agree bcause if you can be in a relationship with an individual for a long period of time and you trust her with your heart and everything else, why can't you just marry the person.
Am I the only one who feels this way? Would you be okay with being with someone for more than, lets say 3yrs, and still be in the "talking or dating" stage? How important is making it official or getting married to you?